THE Beatles may have believed all you need is love, but personally I think Guns ‘N’ Roses had it right: All you need is just a little patience.

When I was 21, recently graduated, living with my parents and employed as a government artist (ie, drawing the dole), I was alone in the house one day, idling aimlessly in front of the TV as usual, feeling disaffected with life, when a traveller knocked at the door trying to sell sprigs of ‘lucky’ heather.
Maybe it was the way I tried to shut the door in her face (firmly but politely, you understand...), but she took one look at me and said: “Be patient and everything will come to you.”
Three weeks later I had landed my first job, was looking for a flat with my boyfriend and couldn’t have been happier.
I used to believe I had the patience of a saint. Then I had a child.
Trying to get my daughter to sleep as a baby was a recurring nightmare. I would regularly spend hours ‘putting her down,’ only for her to wake up 10 minutes later, meaning I had to start the whole process again. I wanted to put her down then, alright.
Now, aged four, she regularly tries my patience in that unique way young children have. Taking hours to walk 500 yards when I’m in a rush. Spending an age getting dressed for bed or school. Deciding she’s hungry - no, sorry, STARVING - just as we’re about to leave the house.
Is patience still a virtue? These days, in the West at least, we’re programmed from birth to expect everything to come our way instantly. At the touch of a button we can speak or write to someone on the other side of the world; our food takes two and a half minutes to get from freezer to plate.
Maybe that’s why we get so stressed out over the little things in life, such as traffic jams, train delays and computer crashes – we don’t like being kept waiting.
It also explains why we’re reluctant to work hard to get somewhere or attain something. We want everything, and we have to have it now. Whether it’s love, the perfect job, a child, a size 8 body or the latest 42-inch telly, if it’s not ours when we want it - ie, instantly - we get frustrated.
A recent addition to the ever-growing band of single mums, I realise my need for patience is more important than ever. Whatever plans I may have had for the future have all been put on hold, as I struggle to start a fresh, somewhat lonely, life, with new demands.
Maybe that lottery win, new man and fulfilling social/work life are just round the corner.
I suppose I’ll just have to be patient.

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